Body Language, Part 1: Dating Signals

Body Language is an interesting thing. It is said that over 60% of all communication is through body language. I don’t know if that’s true or not, but I do know that it definitely is a huge chunk of communication. I recently read a book by Leil Lowndes, on how to pick up on signals women use when they are interested in somebody. I studied it and learned the all the signals. Over the next few months, whenever I went to restaurants, bars, clubs, etc, I started watching for these signals. Now I don’t consider myself a ladies man in any way, so I wasn’t paying attention to these signals in relation to me. I was paying attention to the couples at each location. At first I didn’t see anything, then slow but surely they started to appear. The leans, the touches, and tugs, they were all there and they were right there just glaring at me. How could I have never seen them before? All these signals are so obvious.

I started thinking, and it made perfect sense. It’s like when you go and buy a new car. You noticed a few of them on the road every now and then, but now that you bought it, you start to see them all over the place.

Anyway, back to what I started to see. I took all the signals I was noticing at face value, because I couldn’t just get up and ask these couples, if she was really into him or if he was picking up on it at all. Then last week it all came together. I went on a first date with a woman that I met on one of those online dating sites. As the date went on, a few of the signals appeared here and there. As a result of what I learned in the book, I believed them to be true signals of what she was feeling and responded subtly to them. Whether she was specifically or consciously doing them, I don’t know. I do know they were signals that she liked me.

How do I know that? The date ended really well. I was walking her back to her car, when suddenly she turned and kissed me long, good, and hard. After which, she apologized saying she didn’t normally do that but she couldn’t help herself and she just had to kiss me.

Now you may be asking, what were these signals she was giving you and… Well based on Leil Lowndes there are 26 signals, just like the alphabet. I won’t get into all of them, but here’s a handful of them:

1. Girlfriend Gab. If you see two or more women talking, laughing, and looking at you (maybe even pointing). THIS IS A GOOD THING.
   
2. Jewelry Tug. She keeps playing with a necklace or earrings or something.
   
3. Shoe Dangle. She dangles her shoe off her foot.
   
4. Innocent Touch. She “innocently” touches you. Your shoulder, hand, something.
   
5. Space Invasion. She invades your space. We all have our comfort zone bubble and she enters it.
   
6. Lean to you. She leans in towards you.
   

The other thing to note is that any one signal doesn’t mean anything by itself. Her feet could hurt or you could be in a loud club where she can't hear you. It’s when these signals start to group together that they start to truly show what she’s feeling.

Now I must admit that this book was written for men in the dating scene, but I can see how this would be useful for women as well. If you are a single woman and you want to let a guy know you are interested, without him knowing you are telling him you are. Of course unless he has read this book.

If you want to know more, or learn all 26 signals, check out Leil’s book:
Undercover Sex Sectrets


-Colin